Jacklegs

jackleg (jack-legg) [noun] – Slang. a contemptibly fatuous, moronic, or inconsequential person

Tiger Woods

Just about everyone and their dog knew about Tiger Wood and his extramarital affairs with hordes of women, barmaids, strippers and pornstars. Upon learning of his betrayal, his now-ex-wife, Elin Nordegren, allegedly chased him outside the house with a golf club of all things. While I believe everyone can appreciate the irony in that situation, what makes him a jackleg was that he was hit with a $100 million divorce and loss of some major sponsorship money. He even spent $10 million on trying to keep one of his mistresses quiet. *facepalm*

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John Terry

John Terry jacklegism is impressive in its diversity. Undoubtedly a brilliant footballer he is not just a cheater, he is also a terrible friend and apparently racist. The married father of two cheated on his still-wife with a slew of women, including his best friend and team-mate Wayne Bridge’s wife. Later on he was accused of racially abusing a fellow player, which ultimately ended up in him losing his England captaincy. The millionaire Chelsea captain, also cried when missing a penalty that cost his team the Champions League, poor guy.

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Lane Kiffin

Like everyone else on this page Lane Kiffin is moronic to say the least, unlike his associates however who have reached the pinnacles of their respective field, Kiffin is average or inconsequential at best. His controversies include indirectly causing a riot, when he quit a position at University of Tennessee to join USC Trojans at an awful time in their season. There was also a deflating ball scandal, impromptu allegations at various coaches in press conferences, a bizarre polling debacle and an incident where he banned a reporter from games for doing his job. He also briefly had an NFL career but left with a less than impressive record of 5-15.

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Cristiano Ronaldo

The man is a footballing colossus, clearly one of the best players to have ever played the game of football. He has played at the biggest teams, the biggest competitions at the highest levels and has some frightening statistics, so much so that in the Champions League final betting sites gave him even money to score, despite entering the game injured. He scored. He even gives money to charity! Maybe it’s the underwear ads, his sulkiness when things don’t go his way, the sometimes token flamboyant skills that seem to serve no purpose, but you cannot shake the feeling that he is a slick git who you would want to know, but not spend more than 5 minutes of your time with.

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Mark Clattenburg

Being a referee is a tough job. It’s a job in which you can only be remembered for failure; do well pundits and fans will talk about it for 5 minutes, do badly the media will cover it for months. Regardless of some so-so performances Clattenburg makes the list not for his refereeing competence (they all have bad days), but his seeming preposterous arrogance for someone who is only a referee. He insulted various players while officiating, including all around nice guy Adam Lallana and Welshman Craig Bellamy. Most serious perhaps was allegations he racially abused Chelsea player Ramires during a game, and whilst the criminal investigation was dropped, these sorts of stories never seem to far removed from this greasy haired referee.

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BRITAIN SOCCER

Wayne Rooney

Wayne used to be loved. He had brilliant enthusiasm for football and was so passionate, that when he got sent off for his team (which happened a lot), supporters would pass it off for him caring too much. Even when he frequented a brothel with a lady old enough to be his grandmother people still forgave. Shrek got older, and people became less prone to forgive. He cheated on his pregnant wife (sadly almost inevitable if you’re a modern day athlete). He complained at fans on live TV that had flown half the world to see him in the 2010 World Cup, and perhaps more annoyingly he seems to be motivated unduly by money, first leaving boyhood club Everton for Man Utd, despite saying he would never leave, and then threatening to leave Manchester United twice to engineer big pay rises.

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