Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome back into the Happy Hour. Hopefully, you have recovered from the USWNT drinking game I put together for the World Cup Final; I know it did the trick for me. I was dragging ass all day Monday for two reasons. First, I was hungover. The WWC Final was a classic, and the extra time really did a number on my sobriety. Of course, after the loss, I continued hanging at the bar trying to find an explanation for our tragic loss at the bottom of a bottle of Jameson. Unfortunately, there was not an answer to be found, but I did get to spend time with a particular Gainesville barkeep that I have a certain affection for. Secondly, everyone and their mother had something to say about the USWNT loss. The same people who would bust my balls about wearing soccer jerseys to the office and writing for a soccer blog wanted to come explain to me why we lost. In attempt to be a good soccer ambassador, I calmly listened to the various asinine arguments many people made. When necessary, I explained, or tried to explain to the best of my ability, the finer points of the game. At about 3:30pm, I finally reached my breaking point. A particular department mate of mine that shall remain nameless proceeded to come into my office and proclaim that our coach, Pia Sundhage was, “An idiot who should be fired.” I completely lost it. Its one thing to talk about how penalty kicks are a hard way to decided an international tournament, but don’t come into my office spouting that nonsense. I launched into a tirade that would have made Col. Nathan R. Jessup proud and ended the rant with, “Now get the hell out of my office.” Needless to say, I have yet to speak with him since.
While the talking heads on every network on the planet are arguing whether or not the loss to Japan was a “choke job”, the members of the USWNT have been all over the country getting some media love. The word on the street is that Wambach, Solo, and Morgan have signed a promotion contract for Bank of America. For those of you without a DVR, I wanted to bring together what I think are the best appearances for the USWNT since returning stateside. No matter what happened, Americans watched, and really grew to love this team. Hopefully, the suits in Chicago can keep the momentum going for both the USWNT and USMNT during the Olympics next summer. Onto the USWNT media circus.
Abby Wambach’s Homecoming:
I know this is not technically a media appearance, but I wanted to lead with this one out of respect for myself and Abby’s hometown. Wednesday night in Rochester, New York, the MagicJack took on the Western New York Flash in the WPS. Before the game, WPS big wigs presented flowers to each USWNT squad member present. Alex Morgan of the Flash, and Megan Rapinoe, Jillian Loyden, and Abby Wambach of the MagicJack were honored. On a very interesting note, this match up broke the record for WPS attendance with a total of 15,404 watching a Flash victory. The highlights of the evening included Abby being presented keys to the city, and the first 1,000 fans in attendance begin presented with Abby Wambach bobble heads.
Morning TV Circuit:
If you are anything like me, you are way too out of it in the morning to watch any TV. I need at least two cups of coffee to properly open my eyes. So I was shocked to see the USWNT appear on both Today and Good Morning America in the same week. During the Today interview, two things struck my fancy. First, it was nice to see the captain Christie Rampone get some face time. She played admirably in her final international tournament, and deserves our acclaim and respect. Second, with all due respect to Rampone, the star was clearly my future wife (hold your comments) Megan Rapinoe. Watch the beginning clearly to see magic ear to ear smile until she realizes the camera is rolling and tries to get all serious. Also, the dude “planking” in the US Armed forces videos is classic.
Hope Solo and Abby Wambach on Letterman
Another great appearance from the ladies here, educating Letterman on the finer points of the beautiful game. I have always loved Letterman because he kicks Leno’s ass nightly, even if the ratings say otherwise. He’s also open to American heroes, even the ones that play soccer. The best part of the kicking soccer balls into cabs segment is the innocent bystanders getting completely crushed by the deflections.
Megan Rapinoe Song
You want more Megan Rapinoe? You got it? This song is hilarious. I wish I could write an EMO love song for her. I have no idea who these dudes are, but I guarantee they wear skinny jeans, black frame glasses, and ride one speed road bikes to and from their barista gigs. They probably live in Portland. And they like the Timbers.
Hope Solo Song
First of all, you’ve got to love the way this song starts, “I can’t believe I am doing this right now. I’m sorry. I’m drunk.” Love this guy; not beating around the bush, he just comes out and says what is on his mind. Yes the song is graphic, but part of me thinks Hope would be flattered. If not, she will probably find this guy and give him an incredible beat down. Speaking of Hope Solo, we should also note that she made the cover of Sports Illustrated this week. She is the first female athlete to make the cover since Serena Williams, and the first soccer player since the trio of Landon, Clint and Timmy before the 2010 World Cup.
The Daily Show and Rachel Maddow
I personally think Jon Stewart and The Daily Show rules. If you don’t like him, let’s just say our political beliefs differ greatly, but that doesn’t matter and even if it did, it would be a post for another blog, not one about soccer. This video is great for several reasons. First you get to relive the “The Cross”, and watch the lady Yanks take their first steps into budding acting careers. Also, a huge shout out to former Yankette Rachel Maddow, who literally looked as if she might faint when she got to meet a few of the USWNT stars on her MSNBC program. It was pure, unadulterated admiration—the kind I have for Derek Jeter, or Neil W. Blackmon has for Chipper Jones—and it was a wonderful moment.
USWNT stars Hope Solo and Alex Morgan made an appearance at the Entourage Premier. Other than looking beautiful, the ladies answered several questions about their reception after returning stateside. While are on the subject, let me mention a few things about Entourage. I used to love the show, but it is time for it to end. It has gotten lame and downright painful to watch. The best analogy is a dying dog. The family sits around the kitchen table debating what they should do with their sick pet. They love reminiscing about the great “old times” and struggling with obvious fact that it’s time to put the poor bastard down already.
PUCK’S FREE ADVICE:
For those of you not paying attention, the COPA America championships have been taking place in South America for the last month or so. This Sunday Uruguay will take on Paraguay to claim the South American Championship as well as a birth in the 2013 Confederations Cup. Find a bar that is playing the game and go watch. It should be a fantastic match between two teams that were not expected to get there. On a serious note, TYAC Editor and Chief NWB brought up an interesting point. No one has ever seen Diego Forlan, or Rom-Com Star Mathew McConaughey in the same place at the same time. Same person? You decide.
Sorry for Partying.
Puck is The Pop Culture Guy for The Yanks Are Coming. He can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org and you can find him on Twitter prepping hard for Manchester City’s Champions League campaign, and already bitching about Dzeko, at @PuckLovesPBR.
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